Journey 10: Learning to Handle Changes

Journey 10: Learning to Handle Changes

Change is inevitable. Everything is constantly changing in this world and you cannot hold on to something that is always changing. You think that some things are solid like relationship, money, work but they are not — they can change, and can be gone in a blink of an eye. Somehow this concept is really hard to swallow for many humans. That is why so many of us are always resisting the change at any cost — we are trying to hold on to things which are no longer working or trying to avoid things that we do not know. But have you ever succeeded in a fight against “change”?

Changes come to your life because they are signs that you need to do something different now to fulfill your life. No matter how hard you try, you cannot avoid them. I am sure you have heard the saying that “the more you resist, the more it persists.” Why do we hate to change? Because humans are creatures of habits. We like what’s familiar and known even though we may not be happy with what we currently have. We have this imagination that “change is scary.” “Change” is something we should fear and avoid at all cost. But how many of you have experienced change and wished, “I should have done this sooner”? This may be letting go of a relationship which wasn’t working, or changing job you didn’t think was a good fit, or letting go of old habits or growing up! Deep inside you often knew that was coming and that was the right thing to do.

We forget that purpose of us living on this earth is to learn lessons. For some, it is about learning and sharing love, for others, how to handle success and money or how to be kind and helpful. Whatever the reasons are, we are here to learn by experiencing our lives. We often get lost in collecting false sense of security like making money, connecting as many friends as possible or studying and collecting knowledge. Those are all fine activities as long as you don’t get lost in them and think those define who you are. We come to earth as a baby with nothing and guess what, we leave this earth with nothing when we die. Our lessons on this earth ultimately make us whole. Lessons cannot be always learned easily or pleasantly — sometimes we learn the best lessons the hard way through difficulty and struggle. We do not always have choices on how we learn our lessons and when.

Change is something you get good at when you do it often. Change is a sign that you need to make an adjustment in your life. That means you are either going in a wrong direction and need to readjust your life or you are moving forward and you need to let go of something which no longer suits you for your next step. Either way, change is forcing you to re-examine your life. So instead of resisting and fighting against change, why don’t we welcome it as an opportunity for growth and face it fully when it shows up.

You cannot fight or avoid the change — it will happen whether you scream and resist or go willingly. You have two choices. Life is like being in the ocean — waves are coming and changing all the time. Would you rather stand in the middle of ocean and fight the waves and struggle? Or would you rather learn to swim and prepare for the next wave? I would choose to swim and not fight the waves.   Keys to getting good at handling changes are: 1) letting go of attachment, and deeply realize that nothing on this earth is solid, 2) trust yourself and the process — whatever the reason is this is exactly the moment you need to make a change. When you stop resisting and letting go, changes come easier and less painful.  You may actually really enjoy swimming this unknown and unpredictable ocean called life.